SSB4 apparently happens, and that means people start doing their annoying predictions again. (Implying they didn't do that before it was announced) Some people have just predicted literally everyone without doing a further research does it have any chance.
"I JUST WANT TO SEE CHARACTERS I LIKE ON SAME PICTURE OK???
Yes kids, 70% of characters (or heads to be more specific) have as much potential to be in Nintendo fighting game than Chris Benoit getting in WWE 2K14.
Yes, people should just leave predicting third party characters and predic Nintendo characters instead, you know, anybody who has appeared in Nintendo product has chance to get in Smash Bros unless it had killed someone.
People have also requested real life people to get in the game, like Shigeru Miyamoto and Reggie Fils-Aime, later being just because of THE FUCKING MAYMAY HE SPREADS.
If real life people have chance, then, why not go back in time, into the days of Super Mario Bros Super Show, the crappy cartoon filled with Pasta jokes and repeating climax. (Annotated Series guys had to ge over all the 50 episodes, poor guys).
Back then, several celebrities made appearance in the show, sometimes in live action, sometimes not. One of the celebrities in 80's who appeared was apparently...
Wait, where's that red thing on his head?
Mikhail Gorbatchev.
If you think i am seriously suggesting Gorbatchev for Smash Bros, you're right. The Man is very important, he killed one of the most dangerous superpowers in history, and he also helped to take down Berlin Wall. Plus, he's still alive! He needs to be honoured by making him one of the newcomers.
He appeared on Mario cartoon, therefore Nintendo has RIGHTS to use him, how they added him to cartoon AND live-action segment if they wouldn't had rights.
Oh come on, do you want that piece of MAYMAY bullshit Reggie-Fils Aime to that game? He isn't Segata Sanshiro, or Miyamoto, he's just stupid american vidya gaem nerd with scary face, he is american, he might be Drug user or something!
Mikhail is much better character, and russian players can imagine it's Putin and kick his ass, unless Russia bans it because it has Megaman, and he's a MAN, AS IN RUSSIANS KNOW WHAT MAN IS AND BECOME GAY!
Mikhail's moveset also should involve potatoes, and his introduction pun is "Mikhail Gorbatchev Breaks The Fourth Wall!". Hahaha, that is better than most of the fake puns.
I know this is ridiculous, but at least i'm not suggesting Spiderman, Spongebob, all the ponies ever appeared on MLP:FiM or Milli Vanilli.
They broke up because they didn't know in what position they fap for Kootie Pie.
Yes, this is my bloody blog, and i'm back for some cool action when i review not-so-cool things.
So, this week i finally had it with Avery Petrie, better known as G0ATFAC3, i finally learned he is a huge jerk who doesn't care about his fans and just does stuff for his "friends". He is also dick towards everyone who are not his "friends" and hates popularity, while being an egoistical maniac.
So, now i bring you: his terrible Let's Play saga, G0ATFAC3, i mean D33RFAC3 Corner, with a sooper-dooper original name: Death Wears Blue.
Is that supposed to be a reference or something? D33RFAC3 means blue, so does this mean D33RFAC3 is evil, think before you give these tacky names, scrap-brain.
And OH GOD THIS IS 16 MINUTES LONG, OH WELL. LET'S DO THIS:
First we see our least favourite doppelganger, D33RFAC3, doing some emo pose while annoying 8-bit music plays, accompanied by his duffer friend, Kaiko Yoen.
And then after title we see D33RFAC3 relaxing on a table while Red Skull Fortress watches him. NICE USE OF SHADE HERE, AKA None.
That Red Skull is apparently Red Skull from Marvel Comics, how unoriginal!
Next, we see Kaiko Yoen and ummm... what is that thing, and left to that, there's a dog.
It's not any kind of dog, it's A CHARACTER BASED ON AVERY'S DOG. Yes, guys. A Character based on dog, not only that there are characters based on his intranet friends and wazzacky doppelgangers we have characters based on dog. Well, is there any other character based on dog on a Let's Play show? No. But it's stupid. I dislike that dog, and that ummmm.... thing scares me.
Well, Kaiko says the gang's all up on and then we cut back to lazily edited pic and D33RFAC3 asks what's with the dogs?
Yeah, i wonder too what's with the bloody dog.
Well Kaiko tells that dog tried to murder them earli...WOO WOO CUT THE BRAKES.
Not only the character is based on dog, it's also a doppelganger-murdering dog, wow. Making his dog more important than food, do these plonkers ever go to the bathroom?
Also Kaiko tells that he gave dog bath and made it fat. WOW FAT-SHAMING HERE.
Then we see what that thing is, AND WOOPADOOPA IT'S ANOTHER BLOODY CHARACTER BASED ON BARMY DOG.
So the dog's name is Dave, and D33RFAC3 mentions also that crazy Dave, whose country JOINED EU AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS MONTH AH-HA.
Anyways, It turns out there is no name of Dave in there, Kaiko thinks Master Neojock thought he wasn't important while doing that creepy smile.
Then, D33RFAC3 goes on with the "M33TING" and then he shows the image of main-baddie, GL1TCHK1D.
How i loathe this guy, he was killed in the last season and he keeps coming back, sometimes it seems he's like the MAIN CHARACTER OF THIS SHOW, or then last season focused on him too much. Also the pic is old but also SUPER-EDGY, also stealing the one-eyed villains from Homer the Poet, how unoriginal. Then, we see flashback where G0ATFAC3, summons GL1TCHK1D from Hell (Also known by gamers, Sonic '06 EHAHUHEHAHUHEHA) so D33RFAC3 tells GL1TCHK1D killed everyone last year blah blah blah. We also see his transformation, which is a fusion of Cyclops and Red Skull. The Transformation itself looks actually pretty cool, but doesn't have that much detail on it and is generic badly drawn edgy form. Also, it doesn't have to do anything with Glitches.
AND THEN WE SEE WHEN AVERY TURNS INTO A BLOODY SUPER SAIYAN! I THOUGHT CRASH BANDICOOT RETOLD WAS ENOUGH! RED SKULL CYCLOPS VS INDIE-GAME MAKING EGOISTICAL RAT SUPER SAIYAN! I loathed that episode, and i still do.
Now, back on video, then we see Mummy-Snowman, (Yetay from WCW) coming outta nowhere and turning into GL1TCK1D's reanimated soul. Hold on a second, he has red lines, GL1TCHK1D IS JUST LIKE CYBERSKULL FROM MIGHTY BLOODY MAX. However, this coming from the god of unoriginality it doesn't surprise me.
Well, then D33RFAC3's manky presentation ends and he wants to go to the Skull Castle of Red Lines. But Kaiko asks about his second discovery and D33RFAC3 shows it to him and it is...
that he has inate record on Let's Plays as well.
Sigh.
And that something URGES him to play vidya gaymes.
Bloody Sigh.
No need to explain what he was doing while planning this crap.
And Kaiko is like, OH THAT SOUNDS LIEK FUN and goes to make Snacks.
Also there is "One Hour Later" caption, expect Hour has been replaced by SNACKS, if this was meant to be comedy, it's actually tragedy, head-achingly terrible tragedy that makes Bolsheviks regret that they killed Tsar Family.
Well, One SNACKS Later, We see D33RFAC3 entering the castle of Red Lines and A BLEEDING EYE! PEOPLE WITH BLEEDING EYE ARE BAD! And we see Kaiko Yoen carrying boxes, as in COMEDY! And then, "L3T'S ROCK"
How many protagonists have said that? So many, i forgot them all.
Then we see second-worst thing i have ever seen in this videos, Wily's Castle but instead of skull it has THAT EYE ON IT. WOW REALLY? YOU DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE THAT YOU RIP-OFF CAPCOM, They will sue you but cancel it because they're busy with their own terrible projects. And "Stage 1" caption, so we won't forget this is a show about VIDYA GAMES RIGHT?
Then, we hear the terrible recording noise, does this mean, oh no, this means...
GORDON BLOODY BENNETT! HE'S GOING TO LET'S PLAY! AND HE SOUNDS LIKE JIMMY THE SQUIRREL, FOR ALMOST ADU...oh wait, i forgot he was a man-child.
And boy, does this mean LET'S PLAY SAVES THE WORLD??? AND MATTERS MORE THAN ANYTHING!???? WHAT???? WHAT IN THE??? WHO DECIDED THIS??? BLOODY HELL, THIS IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS USE OF SRS BSNS EVER! IF YOU PLAY RETRO GAMES WHILE YOU TALK, BOOM! AL-QAEDA IS DEAD! IF YOU MAKE CORNY JOKES WHILE PLAYING GAMES, BANG! CHINESE ARE FREE FROM SLAVERY!
THIS IS BULLSHIT! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST HEAD IN AND SMACK THAT ASSHOL...excuse me, PIKEY IN THE FACE. OR JUST LET THEM ALL DIE.
I can't handle that fuck...excuse me, bloody voice for long, so let's skip that part, 05:48, and we see now D33RFAC3 fighting fictionally against Bubbleman, but, it doesn't look like Bubbleman, it looks like...
DAVE! OH GORDON, HIS HOLY GOD FRIENDS HAVE TURNED INTO BADDIES AGAIN! Dave, being Croatian, is too polite, in real life he is just mad all the time, so G0ATFAC3 is dictator in this universe who shapes people as he likes to be, and they need to act like G0ATFAC3 want or they will be busted out of existence? FRIDGE BRILLIANCE! Well, Dave is the Sailor Guy, wow how unoriginal.
AND BOOM! HE'S BUBBLEMAN AGAIN! Skipping again, 06:39
And Dave's dead. Pow, and he's no longer Bubbleman. I wish D33RFAC3 would kill him, his real life counterpart is a hyper-hipster arsehole, who gets bitter all the time. So, Dave survives and D33RFAC3 returns to, somewhere where Kaiko Yoen is waiting for him. And suddenly it gets 2edgy4me. Crying that the guy there was Dave, just KILL HIM. And then, silent NOOOOOOO and copied image goes thru the screen, what a skanky spoiler.
There's the half left of this shit, i feel like backing up, but i have to do this.
Cut again to copied image, with Stage 2 written in Roman Numbers, how unoriginal.
Let's skip all the way to 10:44, where we see D33R and Sebastian.
Who's Sebastian? Well, an irrelevant Doctor Who and Michael Jackson fan, Hmm, Doctor Who fans send deaththreats to people who didn't enjoy the show and Michael Jackson is a child rapist who has faith in industry just because the guy is dead and had a cool game on Sega Genesis. And Sebas is also sarcastic, so chav him.
Well D33RFAc3 proceeds to kill the guy, (DO IT) but Flash Man notices his Botch and then turns into real Flash Man. And let's skip to 11:30, where we see that copyrighted image THIRD BLOODY TIME and Stage III begins, let's skip it too, 14:36 and we have tart mouse. Yes, an actual tart mouse? Furry? What is that thing, it has tits, so it's a woman, and Avery knows her, so she's a tart.
Tart just blinks, and D33RFAC3 TAKES DINK KNOING BARREL????????
AND RUBS HER FACE ON IT.
You know what that is? IT'S A RAPE SYMBOLIZING YOU INSENSITIVE CHAVS.
As D33RFAC3 continues to rub her face with a barrel, suddenly the tart goes all NYYAAURGH and gets an edgy cyclops face.
What is up with GL1TCHK1D and his fetish for bleeding cyclops? Did he met Odysseus? Oh wait, Odysseus was too hard man to play stupid vidya games. AND THERE COMES THE CYCLOP DEMON OH GOD BLERGH
AND THERE'S THE WOOD MAN AGAIN? WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?
Let's skip this, and now Kaiko Yoen and the other one are suddenly there, what happened to the demon? Did they actually kill them? DID THEY ACTUALLY KILL THEM?
YES! YES! THIS IS THE FINAL SEASON OF G0ATFAC3 CORNER! Or at least those gits will not be seen again.
And, someone is watching, i wonder if it's a cyclops face too... And then we see "TO BE CONTINUED" thank god it's over. Too many cyclops for me, and it's just damn terrible, ok bye.
According to Wikipedia, Mark means "a person who enjoys professional wrestling as if it were unstaged. Derived from the carnival term," knowing Wikipedia this is obviously a lie, because Mark is more an internet pro-wrestling fan, who is member of IWC. Smark is told to mean "A fan who is aware of and interested in the backstage and non-scripted aspects of wrestling".
Really, Wikipedia? I know you've spewed out bullshit before, but Smark doesn't mean anything like that.
But, if you insist, then i guess all the angry members of IWC are labeled as "Crappers" from now on.
What is Crapper exactly? Well...
Crapper is a person who follows WrestleCrap and Wrestling. Basically labeled as "Angry Video Game Nerd of IWC", because Crapper just wants to find all the negative points of angles and wrestlers and then make fun of them with other crappers. Crapper takes everything seriously and is known to get butthurt over everything. Crappers hate marks, IWC and even each other. Crappers don't cause that much damage because they are locked on the Hell of IWC, Craphole The Wrestling Forum, where they argue with each other forever.
Crappers have really mean sense of humour, that has been actually handed down from R. D. Reynolds, the founder of Wrestlecrap and "the god" of Crappers. Crappers are atheists of Wrestling because they judge wrestlers from their real-life activites, which is the reason why Chris Benoit is always getting hated on threads and why nobody considers Hogan as the one of the most famous wrestlers in the business. Whenever FAN, wrestlingforum.com or Wrestling Clique sees a Crapper, he'll be automatically banned for life. Crappers are very infamous in the wrestling community, even more so than "Youtube Marks".
One positive thing about Crappers is that they are very intelligent and seem to know more than Marks do and are the masters of Inside Jokers.
Example of Crapper Quote: Again, anyone claiming "oh, WWE
isn't cool anymore so it's okay for their world champion to ignore the
company" needs to stop and pause the tape.
'The fuck are you calling yourself a fan of this business?
If
Rock had brought the belt and mentioned Wrestlemania, then maybe it
would be "culturally relevant" somewhat. Depends on what you call
"culturally relevant". I see a lot of kids watching the product who have
a favorite wrestler. Do we just need more kids watching to make it
"culturally relevant" or do they all need to be wearing John Cena
T-shirts?
Does it even fucking matter if wrestling is cool or
not? Dwayne just told the world that he is not a wrestler, even though
he is a world heavyweight wrestling champion. How can you be okay with
this? How can you be defending this outright shitting on of the business
by Dwayne? The only reason Dwayne even has a shitty movie to star in is
because of wrestling. Without wrestling, we would have given up on this
piece of shit the second the premier of Walking Tall was over.
Buyrates?
A few extra paydays? Dwayne clearly does not give a damn if
WrestleMania sells or not, or else he'd have taken the Leno opportunity
and ANY OTHER OPPORTUNITY HE HAD to promote the show. He's obviously
already been paid for his appearance, or else he'd get off his Hollywood
ass and sell some fucking tickets so that he would be guaranteed his
money and perhaps some extra.
And when your world champion
publically shows that he don't give a fuck about you, your job, your
company, or even HIS job or HIS company...that's no champion. That's a
bitch. And I'm trying real hard not to insult anyone who is on Dwayne's
side, because you're entitled to your opinion. There's just no arguing
your point with me. I love wrestling too much, and I'm probably
borderline trolling here with this thread - but this pissed me off so
bad when I read the newsbite on Rajah that I will bark this shit to the
end.
1. Kaye Fabian Hates Me Now
Apparently i've been a racist for saying the N-Word at the president. Stupid Americans, always being so "patriotic." It also got me banned for life. 2. Craphole
Just, forget about it. It's the rejection of god, (Literally, RD has abandoned it a long ago) and is filled with pointless arguements, stupid laws, paranoid slut cuntbitches who tell their asshole conspiracies and many more.
Just forget about it, Craphole is not worth liking, nobody there is not worth liking.
3. PatStrikesBack Never Grows Up!
Not only that he did personal insults at me, he also seemed to torture VideoGameCutOuts, (Journal Here) who does hard job taking Video Game renders that help several Crash Projects. If he demands people give him respect or he cancels entire Crystal's Wrath i won't be surprised.
4. AX does it again
Any Questions?
I know i've talked about this before. but he seems to never learn when it comes to ANYTHING. He is overpushing a boy with terrible grammar and no sense of "different" WHO CALLS THIS ANIMATION???
Kasuko-San is the Ryback of Deviantart's Giantess Community
I'M BAAAACK! After watching Dramatic Readings of fanfiction several times i decided to step up and review another horrifying fanfiction.
This girl i found has a lot of bad fanfictions so i guess i should check those out too.
No, they're not yaoi, but they're filled with old memes. Yaoi is actually better than old memes because only yaoi i like is Kawoshin.
Ok, let's start this "randomness", i enjoy random humour, but not TOO RANDOM! It must be classy random like Homestar Runner or Charlie Chaplin!
Warning: These are basically pre-2010 Youtube Poop's in a text form.
The Most Random Mario Story Ever I do not own any Mario characters. Nintendo owns them.
That still doesn't save you from Lamar Smith.
Mario: Hey Luigi, Luigi: What? Mario: Armadillos lurk in your toaster.
Is that a MrWeebl reference?
Luigi: What the- Mario: IMMA SCATMAN!
And there the unoriginality starts.
Yoshi: I am gonna eat a chocolate covered lemon! Mario: Are you nuts? Sour and sweet don't mix!
LOLLLL SPENGBAB REFERENCE... i think?
Bowser: THIS! IS! SPARTA!
Irony?
Peach: Nobody cares about the summer of '83!
Gumball reference, oh boy. This sucks.
Daisy: It is OVER 9000!
Rosalina: Pancakes are waaaaay better than waffles.
Why, Rosalina, Why?
King Boo: WHAT? YOU BETTER TAKE THAT BACK , YOU, UM, PANCAKE LOVER! Rosalina: Oh yeah? Make me, you waffle freak! *Rosalina and King Boo start fighting* Mario: Where has this day gone… THE END I KNOW IT'S REALLY BAD BUT THIS IS MY FIRST FANFIC SO PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW ANYWAY.
Yes, i know it's bad, so stop posting these. This should've posted when those memes were FUNNY!
But wait! There's more!
I SAID MORE, NOT MOORE!
It was a beautiful day in the Mushroom Kingdom until... Mario: NARWHALS NARWHALS SWIMMING IN THE OCEAN!
Kill meeee.....
Luigi: I baked you a pie! Mario: Oh boy! What flavor? Luigi: Pie flavor!
a..
s..
d..
f..
......
Daisy: HI I'M DAISY HI I'M DAISY HI I'M DAISY.
Thank you for making Daisy look like a complete moron.
Peach: Eu tenho uma pedra de estimação chamado Cabeça Poopie! Daisy: Lol what?
It has "poop" on it. It's not funny.
Meanwhile at Bowser's Castle... Bowser: Got your nose! Policemen: Watch out, he's got a nose! *tackle Bowser to the ground*
a..
s..
d..
f..
i know i should feel sad for the guy because his friend is dead.
but still.
Wendy: I'm a barbie girl, in a barbie wo-oo-rld. Made of plastic, it's fantastic!
I just imagined that in Kootie Pie's voice. TOLERANCE LEVEL: EXCEEDED!!!!!!!!!!
Lemmy, Roy, and Moron(LOL I wrote moron!): Nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan!
If she didn't say that she wrote Moron, it would've been the only funny part in the story.
Also >Nyan Cat.
Now we are missing Harlem Shake and Ghaggam Style, then i will give up on fanfiction forever.
Larry and Iggy: THROW THE CHEESE! *Throws cheese at everyone*
I wish you wouldn't do that!
Up in space, Rosalina was reading to the Lumas up in space. Luma: Tell us the duck story. Rosalina: Okay. Well, (Bum bum bum, ba-dum ba-dum) A duck walked up to a lemonade stand And he said to the man, running the stand "Hey! (Bum bum bum) Got any grapes?" The man said, "No we just sell lemonade. But it's cold And it's fresh And it's all home-made. Can I get you glass?" The duck said, "I'll pass". Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle) 'Til the very next day. (Bum bum bum bum Bum ba-dum) When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! (Bum bum bum) Got any grapes? The man said, "No, like I said yesterday We just sell lemonade OK? Why not give it a try?" The duck said, "Goodbye." Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle) Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle waddle) Then he waddled away (Waddle waddle) 'Til the very next day. (Bum bum bum bum bum ba-dum) When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! (bum bum bum) Got any grapes? The man said, Look, this is getting old. I mean, lemonade's all we've ever sold. Why not give it a go?" The duck said, "How 'bout, no." Then he waddled away (Waddle waddle) Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle waddle) Then he waddled away (Waddle waddle) 'Til the very next day. (Bum bum bum bum bum ba-dum) When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! (Bum bum bum) Got any grapes?" The man said, "THAT'S IT! If you don't stay away, Duck, I'll glue you to a tree and leave you there all day, stuck. So don't get to close!" The duck said, "Adios." Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle) Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle waddle) Then he waddled away (Waddle waddle) 'Til the very next day. (Bum bum bum bum bum ba-dum) When the duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! (Bum bum bum) got any glue?" "What?" "Got any glue?" "No, why would I– oh!" And one more question for you; "Got any grapes?" (Bum bum bum, bum bum bum) And the man just stopped. Then he started to smile. He started to laugh. He laughed for a while. He said, "Come on duck, let's walk to the store. I'll buy you some grapes So you won't have to ask anymore." So they walked to the store And the man bought some grapes. He gave one to the duck and the duck said, "Hmm... No thanks. But you know what sounds good? It would make my day. Do you think this store... Do you think tis store... Do you think this store...has any… lemonade?" (Fading) Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle) Then he waddled away. (Waddle waddle waddle) Then he waddled away (Waddle waddle)
...
Was that really important? At all?
Luma:(with tears in his eyes) That. Was. Beautiful!
I can tell a better story...
*ahem* Once upon a time, Gordon Freeman wanted Fish! But, when it came to tea time there was nothing on his dish so, Gordon Freeman said "I Must go to the store!" And, when he had arrived, there was black guy at the door! Oh me, oh my, a black guy at the door!
Ok,that was horrible.
Meanwhile at a haunted mansion... King Boo: Do you like waffles? Some Boos: Yeah we like waffles! King Boo: Do you like pancakes? Boos: Yeah we like pancakes! King Boo: Do you like French toast? Boos: Yeah we like French toast! King Boo and Boos: Do do do do can't wait to get a mouthful! Waffles! Waffles! Waffles! Yeah, do do do do can't wait to get a mouthful! King Boo: Do you like waffles? Some Boos: Yeah we like waffles! King Boo: Do you like pancakes? Boos: Yeah we like pancakes! King Boo: Do you like French toast? Boos: Yeah we like French toast! King Boo and Boos: Do do do do can't wait to get a mouthful!
...
THAT WASN'T NEEDED EITHER!
Meanwhile in Diamond City, two twin girls just got out of work for the day. Kat: Hey, you know how Mona Pizza serves coffee now? Ana: Yeah? Kat: You know about how you can have them write your name on the cup and have them
Ok this is possibly stolen joke so i won't show the full story.
Ashley: Katniss, huh? That prank never gets old.
Meanwhile at Wario and Waluigi's place... Wario: WHAT?! YOU DIVIDED BY ZERO?! Waluigi: Sorry! I didn't mean to! Wario: Well, it's too late for that! Now look what you did! A
black hold appears from nowhere. It grows larger and larger until it's
the size of the entire planet. The black hole then sucks up the entire
planet from existence. That's what happens when you divide by zero.
No it doesn't! Ugh, that was horrible. Bunch of old fads and references to bad shows.
But tune in next week, when we come back to review the next fapfic! Whatever it is, before that, So Long, Gay Bowser!
HEHEHEHEHEHE GEDDIT? THAT WAS A JOKE LIEK BANANAS EHEHEHEHE GIRL YOU KNOW ITS GIRL YOU KNOW ITS GIRL YOU KNOW ITS GIRL YOU KNOW ITS TROGDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!!!!!!! I WANNA BE A HULKAMANIAC, A FUN WITH FAMILY AND DIE!
THIS IS OUTDATED! CM FORUM IS NO LONGER PART OF CRASH MANIA! SO FORGET ALMOST EVERYTHING THIS SAYS! I'M NO LONGER ALLOWED TO LIKE CRASH!!
As you may know, the Crash Bandicoot Fanbase was shattered this week by this image.
I AM THE COUNTER FROM ONCE UPON A TIME...MAN!
This very image ended up causing two-sided havoc. Kids believed it was real, while the angsty 40-year old virgins at the CM Forum thought it was fake and wanted the show the message.
The video where Bring Back Bandicoot ranted about this image being fake, ended up being the biggest cause of shitstorms since the infamous "prototype incident". NOT THAT PROTOTYPE INDICENT!
Crash Mania was blamed for hating Crash, to be honest, i think they strongly dislike Crash because they hate the fanprojects and other Crash sites, just visit the Crash Mania, how many of them even have Crash on their icon? I know not everybody on Craphole have wrestler on their icon, but still, those people are a bunch of dicks.
I find it pretty ironic that they're trying to "Bring Crash Back", via their stupid petition, but what if it has completetly opposite meaning? They're trying to keep Crash away so Activision can keep making Call Of Duty?
A lot of people who act in that behaviour like people in Crash Mania act that way, they might be bunch of angry 4chan veterans who don't believe that platforming would be a success anymore.
I demand Crash Mania will be closed along with it's crappy forums, and also stop that horrible petition that has done nothing but damage.
Also, BringBackBandicootCM called me a moron. IS THAT HOW YOU ACT TOWARDS PEOPLE? OWNER OF SITE THAT HAS BEEN AROUND FOR ALMOST 10 YEARS???
i saw this shit today and it fucking sucked. seriously, a white jacket??? for me? dave mcdonalds?
if you want to find out what the fuck is this, then watch this picture.
do you see that? i look like a motherfucking child cartoon character!!!! i am uglier than mouse nicky!
FUCKING NICKY YOU STOLE MY ARMANDO! YOU AREN'T EVEN THAT HOT! YOU KNOW WHAT NICKY? GO KILL YOURSELF, YES, COMMIT SUICIDE! SLICE YOUR THROAT OPEN! I SAW YOUR TUMBLR AND IT FUCKING SUCKED! AND DON'T TRY TO SHOW YOUR UGLY FACE AND SCREAM "NICKY" ON MY FACE FOR TEN HOURS STRAIGHT! HERE IN CROATIA I'M HAVING MY GUNS ALREADY! I WANT MY BLUE SHIRT BACK EVEN ARMANDO LIKES IT!
For all these years i've heard how much people don't care about me. How they don't give a fuck, shit or anything what i do, what i say and what i think.
But you know what? That is just too silly, i mean, why should anyone tell me that they don't care what i do? That doesn't weaken me, that just wants me to do more.
"Anything i say doesn't mean anything anymore".
WHAT DO YOU FUCKING MEAN BY THAT? That i don't matter anymore? Listen up, just because YOU say it doesn't matter does it mean it really matters? It's just YOUR Opinion. When i say it, it's the truth because i am the target, i am the person does all the things that do not matter to you. If i would say it doesn't matter, THEN it wouldn't matter.
I can tell whatever i fucking want, this is internet. Here's the freedom of speech, so i can say what i want to, act how i want to, mock who i want to and DO what i want to.
And if you think i have no life, it's just your opinion, even if i showed up once a year you would STILL tell me i have no life, besides "YOU HAVE NO LIFE"-skit is old shit and only newfags use it.
Listen up, i am making good numbers at school, i DO have a life, because i have a time to improve it.
Telling me that you don't give a fuck, that is just pathetic and you're too lazy to see that bullshit, and you might be even afraid! So in that logic, you're a pussy. So when you say "I don't care" or something like that you're really saying "I don't bother to see your stuff because i'm a huge coward and i don't want to see your shit because i'm afraid i might get butthurt."
So it's better to see it or just stay fucking silent.
Also, telling me to "leave" or "shut the fuck up" NEVER works, do you really think words can hurt. I've seen many insults, and words hurt more when they're shouted STRAIGHT ON YOUR FACE. Internet is a different thing, or then it's just me.
You see, everything i say will matter at some point. You guys just are too lazy to answer because you try to show that you have a "life", that is just stupid. How much do your fingers hurt when you write a sentence??? You are just a worthless, piece of boredom, and i will be always better than you, in some way at least, The End.
Welp, we promised a hiatus, but we are still here to rant about the five worst things happened on this week in world and the personal Circle!
1. The Opinion Arguement On Craphole!
Surpisingly it's not SilentStranger, it's tgb. He started to argue with everyone from CM Punk's title reign. There are arguements everyday in Craphole, but this one gone straight for 4 PAGES! That is a record, son!
Madness starts here: http://newwrestlecrap.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=wwe&action=display&thread=14486&page=5
Pictured: Not the Pope, but close enough.
2. The Pope Resigns
So, the whole catholic world was shattered when pope announced his retirement. Nowadays, Pope means nothing because atheism is taking over the world slowly. But people like AX or silentstranger have started to rant how this generations pope Benedictus sucked, because he allowed rape (HOW SURPISING)
I think the next pope will be George Clooney, oh come on! He even has white hair!
3. Avery is still a hater, What a suprise!
I don't like Dave and Armando (As you can see), and i told it to Avery. Suddenly Avery thought i was still hating on him! I thought he thought i thought i had apologized! I don't even know anymore... although one of the things made me laugh that Dave found it out that "Dave and Armando aren't worth liking" INSULTING. Pfft. People have told me that right in my face IN EVEN WORSE WAY. However if Dave is still aggressive he might get... Lu... i mean forbidden by Avery. 4. More Brony Drama
This week has got a lot of drama... Fighting Is Magic getting cancelled and more Alicorn Twilight, one of the biggest things however, was this:
NOW IN THREE COLORS
Yes, as you can see. THERE IS A MOVIE COMING OF HUMAN MLP GIRLS. No, that may be true. And it caused a huge shit storm that all the bronies were so thin, and wanted to respect equal opportunities, just like Armando.
Seriously, if they all were like NICKY!, that wouldn't be amusing either. 5. Fortan Reviews Everything Runs Out of Ideas!
Yes, this blog just doesn't feel so fun anymore (and i can't find bad enough fanfic). So expect hiatus, thankfully, i had time to make this.
Honourable Mentions:
Anjelo was EpicTroll all the time!
AX's Angered Message out of nowhere
Bruno Sammartino gets inducted into WWE Hall of Fame
Bigger-than-big is gone too.
FANDOMSTUCK
We knew it would happen... sexyasiangirl left collaging... i left collaging... and Giga-Sakura is leaving the whole community of GTS.
She was a nice person, and she will definetly be missed. I guess AX is behind it somehow...
2. Alicorn Twilight!
I am not a brony, but hell, soon there aren't any bronies because "HAZNOBRO" breaks them up. You see, Twilight Sparkle has turned into a winged thing. And bronies don't like it because it makes her Mary Sue. And series will jump the shark and molest it and then burn it.
The whole hate towards Alicorn-ified Twilight Sparkle is incredibly silly. And i know i should shut up about ponies, but if MLP:FiM-fad "dies" it definetly makes the list.
But otherwise those crapsacks stay away from my trashcan.
3. GigaSurfer Blogpost causes one hell of a mess.
Fortan Reviews Everything losed it's reputation after making a blogpost about Rantists, that featured the-word-that-i-dont-mention. Some stranger even made a comment on it, one of the very rare things you can find from this blog. I hope this doesn't repeat.
4. Super Bowl Black-Out
All the fat americans lo... i mean, ALL THE NON-ARIZONAN Americans love Super Bowl! Sadly something happened and electricity was taken off for half an hour and many fathers took a divorce.
But no worries! OREO cookies saved the day with epic advertisement! (The ad will be reused when Solar Storms shut down the most of Earth's electricity)
5. Tumblr Day Leaked!
I don't see why people hate fads when Forced fads are much worse. I am afraid of April's 1st but now i also have to be afraid of March 3rd. The day when all the crazy little tumblr people show how Transvestite they are. Ugh, i'd rather celebrate World Math Day than that. HONOURABLE MENTIONS:
Fortan's horrible school season!
5thHorseman it's nuts and Mental Pills still don't work!
Comment on Tachin's video causes one hell of a mess!
Oh yeah, i actually found something. And i would like to thank MagicalBiscuits for finding this, or actually i found it myself because this guy hates me!
Well, before we review this, let's do recap how many fanfics i've reviewed...
Crossovers count, but not two-part series like My Immortal.
1 Sonic Fanfic
2 Homestuck fanfics
3 MLP Fanfics
1 Vocaloid fanfic
3 Evangelion Fanfics
1 Digimon fanfic
1 Yu-Gi-Oh fanfic
1 Lucky Star fanfic
1 Spongebob fanfic
1 Penguins of Madagascar fanfic
1 Harry Potter fanfic
1 Pokemon Fanfic
1 Simpsons fanfic
and soon 2 Crash Bandicoot fanfics
Well, MLP and Evangelion have been my favourite subjects, but Neon Genesis Equestria and End Of Boredom are crossovers.
I am not sure when i reach 50 Fanfics, but i promise i will review something big for that day.
But, let's move on to this fanfic, the writer of this has diaper fetish, and everyone who have fetishes are told to be mad men.
I do have macrophilia, expansion fetish and crowd fetish, but no inflation or fat fetish because they're disgusting.
Diaper fetish is also disgusting, so let's see how this fucks up.
Ok I'm not good with stories but I'm gonna try for all you guys.
Do it properly or don't do it all! That's why i never post my drawings to internet anymore.
One day Crash was walking along with Coco and Crunch since they were
really the only familey he had
Aku Aku is also part of his family, but how do you put a diaper on floating mask with no feet?
Just then all 3 of them saw cortex And
knew something was up and ran up to him.
Of course Cortex is so evil he shows up on Bandicoots as himself and totally doesn't appear with airship or holo-project image or Coco Bandicoot costume.
"Stop right there bandicoots." Said Cortex "Excuse me why have you instucted us to stop." Asked Crash.
You know the fanfic sucks when Crash knows how to speak.
Polar and Pura Came and saw this and was about to attack but Pasdena and Nina grabbed them.
Pasadena isn't a villain! I know nobody likes her, but that doesn't mean she's villain.
"What is the meaning of this?"Asked Coco. "To put you in diapers." Laughed Cortex.
Welcome to the world of Cortex's crazy fetishes. To the chapter 2.
Notes:Why Ripper roo and Coco are a couple I think it's cute
They don't fit to be a couple.
and I know
crunch doesn't have a gf so I made one for him
Bandicoot Fanfiction Law 2: Don't do any hero OC's. (NPC's are allowed though)
same with Polar and
Pura. another side note is Ripper roo is able speak english like he was
supposed in ctr but didn't.
Ripper Roo speaking in CTR was cancelled, so that doesn't count as canon. I don't want to see how this turns out.
"You know Crash baby I think you would look really cute in a diaper." Said Pasadena.
Didn't you die at the end of CTTR?
Crash looked over at Pasadena and blushed. "well since you say so let's get it happening."Said Crash
Crash now wants to wear diaper??? And Pasadena-X-Crash? I'd rather have Crash-x-Coco, yeah i know that's incest but it only works on some cases!
Cortex put the diaper on Crash. "Yep so darn right cute." Said Pasadena. Crash blused again.
You know something is wrong when Crash blushes.
Coco had the feeling something was wrong with what just happend then it
dawned on her they wanted to get crash first that way they could get
everyone else while Coco was distracted with that Tiny put a diaper on
her and then let her go.
At least they don't rape you this time...
Coco started to cry. Crash walked over to her. "Hey sis what's wrong?" Asked Crash. "This is the most terrible thing that has ever happend." Cried Coco.
Crash put his arm around her. "Don't worry sis we will get through this." Said Crash. "But how?" Asked Coco.
"LET'S POSE!"
"We always find a way out of problems." Said Crash. "At that moment dingodile got a diaper on Crunch. "Ok now you made The Crunch mad.
God! Crunch is now Dwayne Johnson!
Pasadena put a diaper on Polar an Nina put one on Pura. "So exactly what is the point of this?" asked Crash. "I'll
tell you right now you have 3 choices you can walk around town like
that let me turn you into bies
Bies? So Crash could ship himself with Cortex?
Everybody knows Crash is pimping with robots.
or let me kill you." Said Cortex.
Well, that makes most sense.
"We will walk around town."Said crash and they leave.
THE END
"Crash I think you made a bad choice." Said Coco. "What makes you say that?" Asked Crash. "Well
think about it We are in dipers walking around town Tawana might see
you and Ripper roo might see Coco and I'm afraid Katrina will see me."
Said Crunch.
Common OC Law 203: Never name your character Katrina, because 90% of Katrina's suck.
"Just like Pasadena I'm sure Twana will think I look cute same with Ripper roo and Katrina."Said Crash.
I like how this guy never spells Tawna right...
"Crash I don't think Pasadena actully likes you I think that was a trick
so they could diaper us So Twana might think something is wrong with
you although Ripper roo being the insane person he is might think I look
cute but Katrina would not find this cute and probaly laugh her head
off." Said Coco.
So Katrina is from CBR?
Polar and pura were thinking the same thing about princess ice and taisha.
Princess Ice from Adventure Time? And Pura would fit more with Yaya Panda, because you know, she is, KIND-OF-CANON.
Just then Crash saw Tawna coming. "Well get prepared Crash." Said Coco.
Why can't they just take their diapers off?
"Don't worry sis I got this." said Crash. Tawna sees Crash and runs up to him then starts to check him out and giggles a little.
Didn't Tawna date Pinstripe?
"Now Tawna I look ridiclous but um." Said Crash. "Ridiclous I think you look rather cute like that." Said Tawna.
I like how Tawna and Crash both misspell Ridicilous in a SAME WAY.
"See sis I told ya." Said Crash. "Oh no here comes ripper roo."Said Coco.
DESTROY HIM!
Ripper roo hops up to Coco and kisses her.
And then throwed a TNT on her...
"So Ripper roo do you think I look cute in a diaper?" asked Coco. Ripper roo nods.
No wonder this guy is crazy!
Crunch saw Katrina coming. "Well we all had good luck so far let's hope the Crunch don't have a problem." Said Crunch.
Katrina didn't exist because HE WAS ONLY A FAN CHARACTER!
Katrina skips up to Crunch. Crunch can't speak.
He ran out of Mr. T-jokes.
"You know what that diaper just makes my Crunch look more hansome." Said Katrina. Princess ice and Taisha glomped Polar and Pura.
I knew she was a CBR-character expy!
"so I'm gonna guess Cortex planned this." Said Tawna. "Yes he did." Said Crash.
"That's right thanks for reminding me they can't do that" Said Cortex from behind. "Why do you have to be so rotten to us?" Asked Coco. "Because I simply hate you." Said Cortex. "That makes sensce." Said Crunch.
It doesn't make sense, it makes SENSCE!
"Hey Cortex you got anymore diapers?" Asked Katrina. "Yes I do why?" Asked Cortex. "Why do ya think?" Asked princess ice. "Yeah there's only one reason." Said Taisha. Cortex hands them diapers and they put them on.
In a world where everyone have a diaper fetish...
"What are you thinking?" Asked Crash.
This story is utterly ridiculous with stupid misspells, false abilities, stupid fetishes and annoying fan characters.
"We aren't gonna let you go throught this alone." Said Tawna. "Really you don't have to do this." Said Coco. "Yess wee doo." Said Ripper roo.
Stop.
"But why?" Asked Crunch. "It feels like destiny" Said Katina.
DON'T YOU SEE IT? DESTINY!
"I stiil think you guys shouldn't have to go through this as well said Polar. "Well we are going too" Said princess ice. "But it's not right." Said Pura. "Well we only care about you guys." said taisha. "So I guess in other words get over it?" Asked Crash.
THE END
Oh god, that was really lame! Still better than Crash Bandicoot Retold though...
That has now raped almost every series ever imagined...
Before we make fun of this fanfic, i've got something to say.
I've ran out of ideas for fanfics to review,so i need your suggestions to get more..
But, this is our next fanfic i've officially decided to review... POKEPHILIA ORGY!
Yes, i haven't reviewed any Pokemon fanfics, and those are one of the worst after MLP, HomeStuck and Naruto.
One day he fell into a hole after chasing a funny rabbit with a clock.
I had just got done swimming in a lake deep in the woods (truth be told I
had gotten lost and just ended up finding a lake so I decided to take a
break from being lost).
So this is an author avatar? Oh geeze.
I was watching my meganium, persian, pikachu, rapidash, houndoom, and typhlosion playing on the shore
All Furry Icons? Check, expect Meganium
All Probably Female? Check
All "hot"? Check
All pre-3rd generation? Check
Man, that team sucks, where are Ninetales, Gardevoir, Milotic, Lapras and Wait, am i telling this guy what Pokemen he would use in his orgy? Fuck my life.
while I got out dripping wet and naked (yes I was skinny dipping)
WE DON'T CARE!
when typhlosion came over to me and started licking my member (which in turn made me hard).
STOP IT YOU, YOU ARE NOT A DOG!
–whoa typhlosion what are you doing-
Nobody told me Tommy Wiseau is going to play Shaun!
I ask trying to push him away
YOU... LITTLE TURD!
but, he just continues and it just starts to fell so good so I just let
him keep going and then I got an idea. –everyone come here I want us to
have some fun together-
Like they totally understand him...
-What do you want- meganium asked
-Yeah we were already having fun- said Persian
SHUT UP I'M ALREADY DEAD
-Yeah- said pikachu -Well since we were already having fun maybe he has something else planed- said houndoom
Never Forget The Fact That Americans Are Dildos, when They Blame Muslims From Everything And Write Horrible Fanfics. I rest my case.
-Ok what did you have in mind Shaun- asked rapidash Well I was thinking of having us a little orgy so how about it That sounds awesome everyone replied
Then Shaun woke up from his pile of unpayed taxes with his student roommates.
Ok so then let's get started ok now let's see typhlosion you get over
here and ill anal you, now pikachu you can get on typhlosion and ill
suck your dick, houndoom you fuck me in the ass, rapidash you and
persian can 69 and meganium you can do whatever you want ok go and on go
everyone got where they were supposed to be.
"What about the condoms? Did you remember the condoms? I don't want to give you Poke-Human abominations again!"
I started with typhlosion by slipping my dick slowly into his hot
pleasureful ass getting a moan or two from him, next was pikachu who put
his dick in my mouth right before getting poked by typhlosion
Actually, those Pokemen were actually his gay friends dressed up as Pokemen.
and letting a squeak out as his ass was being penetrated, then houndoom
came over and got into position and slowly started to insert his dick
into my vacant hole which made me give a muffled moan into pikachu's
crotch getting a moan from him in the process
These guys moan more than that old man in Creepy Castle Catacombs.
now it was rapidash and persion's turn as they got down and started
licking each other's dripping wet pussy's both becoming a moaning wreck
and as they were doing this meganium came over and started to anal
rapidash only causing her more pleasure.
Wait! There is one thing wrong! You forgot to give pleasure to Shaun!
Pikachu was the first to go as I got my mouth filled with cum and
started pumping typhlosion harder as I was getting close, typhlosion was
getting close to as he started to fuck pikachu harder as pikachu all of
a sudden came down and collided his tong with mine and we each started
to make out with spit and cum (from my mouth) dripping down are cheeks
and with that typhlosion came squirting cum all over pikachu's ass and
my stomach and right after that houndoom finished filling my insides
with cum and squirting some out that had escaped my ass, with all this I
was on the verge my hips turning to a blur and I went as deep as I
could into typhlosion squirting every last bit of cum I could into his
ass and getting a long and powerful moan from typhlosion.
TL;DR: Cum harder pump spit harder down down squirting cum cum filling cum cum ass squirting cum spit.
Persian was almost ready to cum, her and rapidash as they buried there
tongs as far as they would go into their sexes and all at once they
squirted all over each other's faces and mouths taking the time to clean
as much of the juices as they could as meganium was pumping faster and
faster until he let out a big moan along with rapidash as he shot his
seed deep into her ass.
The Next day, Proferssor Oak was terrifyed.
-well did all of you find that fun- I asked -oh yes- everyone answered -ok then who's ready for round two-
NOT ME
Everyone just smiled and waited for their directions. Ok let's
see um pikachu I want a go at you, houndoom you can stand on top of me
and ill suck your dick, typhlosion you can fuck Persian anyway you want,
meganium you and rapidash can lick at my dick while I'm going at
pikachu ok let's get started then.
Why can't they go like "What did you say?"
Pikachu came over and got in position and I pushed him down on my long
dick and he let out a moan then houndoom came over and got in positions
as I put his dick in my mouth and he went for pikachu's, typhlosion
didn't spare any time to go at Persian going from her ass to her pussy
taking double shots, meganium came over and started licking the anal
juices coming from pikachu and rapidash did the same as I started moving
pikachu who was in awe at how good he felt at the moment. I was getting
close and so was houndoom as he launched his seed into my mouth and
down my throat and I started to move pikachu faster which only made him
feel that much better and then I came in him as he let out a moan and I
lifted him off me as he gave houndoom his surprise right into his mouth,
typhlosion had gone to just fucking Persians pussy and she has already
cummed once and was on the verge as was typhlosion and when persian did
her juices squirting everywhere and her pussy convulsing around
typhlosion's dick made him soot his seed into her and fill her right up.
TL;DR: I don't know either what's happening, dude.
Ok know let's try something different
"Ok i go to jail while all of you are sterilized sent to free nature where no human will ever catch you again"
-Time for round three- Persian get on my cock and rapidash come
here my tong has a little present for you, typhlosion, meganium,
pikachu, and houndoom you have an orgy amongst your selves with the one
on the bottom analing me ok lets go.
That was just a bunch of sex related words spammed together.
Persian got right down on me and rapidash positioned herself facing
persian and they started to make out, pikachu got on meganium, meganium
mounted houndoom who mounted typhlosion
who mounted Pikachu who mounted Typholison who mounted Rapidash who mounted Persian who mounted the cop near-by and nobody mounted on anyone ever.
and typhlosion stuck his huge dick into my ass hurting me a little, then
we started to move and I was in awe at how Persians pussy felt to my
dick as I was eating rapidash
Pokephilia meets Pokevore!
and all the males where grunting as they enjoyed there fun. Rapidash was
on the verge and was trying to hold it in but failed and exploded all
over me but I didn't care I just cleaned it up and went back to eating
her out, Persian was getting there to and erupted her sex juices all
over hers and my crotch which got me close to cuming and made me pump
faster until I went as far as I could and exploded my seed inside her
and it was so much that it started dripping out, her and rapidash got up
and went over to my ass to lick at it while typhlosion was going at me
harder and harder obviously ready to finish when all at once I could
feel his hot cum filling my ass up and squirting out all over his
crotch, right after that pikachu finished getting a satisfying moan out
of meganium who was getting ready obviously because he was going harder
and harder into houndoom when he blew his load and filled houndoom up
and after that houndoom launched his seed into typhlosion.
(Note: Dave McDonalds isn't a real person, or actually he is. But i'm not him)
i saw this shit today and it fucking sucked. seriously, dwayne "the cock" johnson wins wwe championship? it's 2013 when it's the last time he won it? punk held it for almost a fucking year and then dwayne takes it from him with a GIMMICK ELBOW???? get back to movies faggot seriously you're not David Arquette.
THE "ROCK" IS JUST AN OLD GRANDPA!! HERE IN CROATIA WE HAVE OUR GUNS ALREADY!!!!! JUST LIKE WE DID TO
STJEPAN MESIC!!! WHY DID FRANDO TUDMAN HAD TO DIE???!!! WHY WE DIDN'T
KEEP YUGOSLAVIA!!!! FUCK WORLD AND IT'S PREGATORY!!!!
Okay, Donkey Dudes. It's time to review another infamously bad fanfiction, expect this time there are more than one! All written by Peter Chimei... i mean, Peter Chimaera! This dude gave inspiration to whole "And Then Jon was a zombie"-Meme. But i dislike both memes and zombies, so let's move on. (I'm still not 4channer though, i don't hate the meme if it's used RIGHT! Zombies in other hand are too mainstream and can be never used right.)
First fanfic by him is "My Litte Ponly: Friendship is Danger!"
So we are going to encouter Swedish Pony-men that are trying to teach us Friendship is dangerous?
Oh, i'm not a brony. So i generally dislike everything about MLP, swallow your hate my friend, swallow it.
So let's review this thing:
Friendship is Danger Chapter One Rainbow Dahs woked up and went to at the garden Hello Rainbow Dash "said " a girl pony who wa named Flyhoof.
You know, at least some fanponies had CREATIVE names.
"OK hello Flyhoof I have never met you at before?" "No I am a new pony and we have to find Applyjack"
That Pony who spammed the "Apply Now" button? Yeah, that was the hardest boss in the game.
How do exactly Ponies "come" to Ponyville? From what i've seen from Deviantart there must be about googolplex ponies with most of them being expies of famous characters. I guess no world in a place could fit that amount of beings into one place?
First Rainbow Dash went to Applejack's house and they ate a apple pie
Brought to you by Hulk Hogan.
and then they went to the space base where they had to get ready to go into space
Whoa! What happened? Did i missed something?
"Put on your space suit Rainbow Dash" "OK"
AND THEN JON WAS A ZOMBIE
And then when they landed on the moon aeverything was okay
Expect this
and they had a
picnic but they coudlnt eat because they had to keep their space suits
on so it was only a pretend picnic
YOU GUYS HAVE IMAGINATION LIKE SPONGEBOB!
but while they were gone a hundred
disasters happend
You see, the moon crashed on Earth. And when Moon crashes it's one huge disaster, and then under chain reaction hundred other disasters also happen. Animals die, houses get burned, wars and infighting come after it and also possible attacks of Eldritch Abomination.
Yes i'm trying to make sense out of this fanfic, got a problem with that?
"We have to go back to" Flyhoof said. Flyhoof was a pegasaur but she had horn like unicorn but it didnt do anything.
Pegasaur? New dinosaur species has been found by 8-year old fanfiction writer, Pegasaur! They can be live in moon with space suits! And they have a horn like unicorns! They eat Apple Pies so they are herbivores! They became excint way faster than others.
So they went bck to Unietd Equestraland
Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Volkoff requests, that you all rise and respect the singing of Soviet national anthem!
and found Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle and the other one and then they went to solve the disasters
The Other One is the best pony.
First they found a corcodile
NOW IN 3 SIZES
and they kicked its head and it went "Oof"
Like, that Corcodile had no teeth at all right?
and then gave back all the children it ate
And those were HIS OWN CHILDREN. Have you watched animal documents?
and they were fine but it wasn't time to say horay
This makes MLP look bad.
and they had to get to the job deal done if they wanted to solve the
rest of the disasters and the crocodile felt bad and offered to help
them "My name is Crunch"
"NAMED AFTER MY FAVOURITE FOOD"
"I am Raindbow Dash and these are my friends" and they all went to find the big tree that was burning down
"MOSES!" Tree said. "HERE'S GOD! YOU MUST FREE THE PEOPLE OF EGYPT AND TAKE THEM TO THE PROMISED LAND!"
so they put out the burning tree
"NO, YOU CAN'T DENY THIS OFFER! I MAY BE A GOD BUT I'M ALSO BILLY MAYS!"
"We have to not go in the forest because it is danger"
"And i don't like German names!"
and they went into the forest and Fluttershy got caught in a beartrap and then she died
THE END.
"Fluttershy is dead oh no"
Did The Cheat direct this?
"OK"
No, i'm definetly sure this is the same person who brought us Waligie.
"We will find a key"
What? Where was i?
"Please of hurrying my leg is very much blood" Fluttershy said with cry
NO! THIS WAS WRITTEN BY TARA GILESBIE! SAME BAD GRAMMAR, SAME RANDOM RECOVERS! AND SAME USE OF BLOOD! I HAVE SOLVED A MYSTERY! NOW GIVE ME NOBEL!
So they found a lumberjack pony who came with axe
And made sure Fluttershy stayed dead...
and cut the bear trap off but he got lost. Alog the way they solved
almost all the other disasters aand then found the lumberjack but he was
very sick
Can somebody explain to me what did this say? All i saw was just a bunch of words...
"I was bitten by a poisoned snake" he explared
"That's my brother, Snickers!" Crunch shouted.
"That is nt true you are halucinating and you just got a toad posion"
"That's my sister, Twix!" Crunch shouted.
"But I did not eat a toid"
A name given to a jackass from new york who cant say the words like "thirty" and say it whith a stupidass accent like "toidy". source: Urban Dictionary.
"It does not matter some toads are poisonosu even if you look at them at their eyes"
Poisonosu is my least favourite Touhou.
Authors note im not sure if this true or not but it s part of tht story
I'm not sure should i facepalm or just laugh.
So the lumberjack was solved of the last disaster and everyone was safe.
What happened? Was it a comet? Or maybe a troll?
but Fulltershy could not talk because she was shot and the blood was
everywhere. And then Fluttershy coughed and a hundred blood came out
then she went nothing and everyone sadded.
This is the greatest sentence ever written.
One day they will all would learn to live their lifes without Futtershy who was dead.
One day this artist will learn to write.
This was probably the best worst fanfic i've seen for a while!
But wait! There's more!
The next is: The Simpsons Dinner!
Chapter OIne
What a nice way tOI start the fanfic. I am excited hOIw this will cOIntinue...
Marge had to tell the Homer news. "I am glucky that my sisters are coming over do dinner"
Glucky is Lucky with G accidentally slipped on it. Source: COMMON SENSE
"OH
DOH" and he dropped his hammer on foot because he was fixing dog house
of Sanas little holper
I am too lazy to explain what is Sana and why he needs Holper.
Also i'm suprised they haven't used Oh D'Oh yet on the real show.
when the big news came and he was so shocked of
anger that he dorped it right on his so much toes.
This is the lost episode of Simpsons! Right after Dead Bart! In Couch Gag there is 9/11 joke.
Chapter Two they come over
That was the shortest chapter of all time.
Pass the onions "No, Selma" and Homer ate so many opork chops that he
went "I dont feel so good" and ran to the bathroom "Hwere did homer go"
I really need to create a comic version of this. My horrible drawing style will make this look even so-bad-it's-good-kind of better.
"He went to bathroom dont call your father homer"
Like you didn't even tell who said it... It was that spike-haired bastard who speaks Spanish.
And maggie create suck noise
You don't have to write this, Nobody gives a shit about Maggie.
and shurgged her shoulders because it is all about homers eating too much all the time.
Pretty much every episode is the same these days.
Mr. Burns cammed over and rung the doorbelt. Marge took off her apron "Ill get it. don't be a hurry"
Wait, Burns doesn't even know Homer. How does he know that where Sector 7G loser lives?
But turns out at the door it was Mr. Burns!
Like we didn't knew that!
"I am doing off hours performance review and I need to speech to Homer Simpsons or he gets fired"
It's not Mr. Burns! It's Smithers after he married him!
"But he is in bathroom?what a predicament"
Chapter Three Homer has to get his job back "Mr. Burns I missed performance review but wanted to get my old job back" "No it is too late I have replaced you with ned F;landers"
DOES NED EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE NUCLEAR REACTOR??!He isn't Homer's rival goddamnit!
"doh" "Googly doo mr. Homer I am workling at that power plant you work at" "Ho home flanders"
It's Christmas!
"Okalaydokalry But he thought it was Mr. Burns telling him and went hom so Dr. Burns had to fire him!
"Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. And this is my wife, Dr. Burns."
Chapter four "Hahahahayou lost your job" Homer said to
Flanders and Falnders house
Falnders House lost it's job? Too bad for him. I guess the Griffin's House was way more superior on whatever-job-he-did.
where they were having barbeque to celebrate
Ned Flanders birthday
Barbeque's and Birthdays are a sin!
"It was a pickle"
Ned Flanders's Secret Episode 4.5
"UR NOT MAD" And homer went home and slamped the door on his foot
"not again on my foot" and zelma was still there and laughed at him
badly and so did others like bumblebeeman
A/N: Bumblebeeman is my favorate Simson!
also but Peater Graffin did
not since hes on a different show.
You mean, Peter Griffin from Family Guy or, Beater Graffin from Mythology Wresslin' Super?
That was bad!
Thankfully i'm not going to review more. But this guy is an obvious troll! I like this! This is the best Fortan's Filthy Fanfiction Corner i've ever written. And really pays for My Immortal and Rape Bandicoot!
Crash Bandicoot is rumoured to come back anyday after that Vicarious Visions picture, so, why not make a Crash-related Triple-F? I got tired of My Immortal, so let's review a bad Crash fanfic!
As you know, Crash games are awesome, but the character isn't in "that way". So any attempt of trying to turn our retarded Bandicoot into a mature story will fail.
That includes the tries of turning Crash into a Duke Nukem-copy. Those things seriously scare me.
So for today, we are going to review Crash Bandicoot: Vengeance!!! You know the one where Cortex rapes Coco and...
what? WHAT?
Revenge Deep within Dr. Neo Cortex's lair, the mad scientist
paced the floor thinking of a new way to dispose of his arch nemesis,
Crash Bandicoot "That's It! I've had it with Crash Bandicoot always ruining my plans" Cortex yelled, drawing the attention of the demonic mask Uka Uka.
That's the circle, what would that look like if there would a game where villains wins? (Homestuck doesn't count. That thing doesn't even have a real plot on it)
"Cortex! What's with all the yelling, I'm trying to get my beauty sleep!" Uka yelled, irritated.
Uka Uka used to be cool villain until those Traveller's Tales guys fucked up his personality and turned him into a bad boss. Although he looks pretty badass in Radical's games, haters gonna hate.
"I'm trying to think of a new way to destroy that wretched Bandicoot,
it seems that no matter what, I always fall short." Cortex lamented. "What's with your voice, you sound like that baby from Family Guy" Uka noticed.
He said Family Guy, Okay i can stop reading now.
Or hell, i've seen much worse.
"We'll discuss that later, but right now I must find a way to destroy that wretched bandicoot." Cortex said Cortex's
assistant Dr. Nitrus Brio entered the Laboratory at that moment with
his creation Ripper Roo, who hadn't been seen in years.
Because his second run in Therapy didn't turn out as good as we hoped.
"Cortex, great news, after years of extensive shock therapy I present to
you, the psychiatric expert formerly known as Ripper Roo, Dr. Roo, who I
invented!" introduced.
At least the writer used Mind Over Mutant Brio, he's a great character but very underrated because Radicalz scuks!!111
"N. Brio, not now I'm trying to figure out a way to defeat that wretched Crash Bandicoot" Cortex yelled.
Cortex really likes to use wretched, eh?
"Cortex, don't you understand? With his new high level of intelligence,
Dr. Roo can be very useful in helping us defeat Bandicoot." Brio pointed
out.
Yeah, right... Was Brio blind when Cortex Strikes Back happened? Oh wait, he had fetish for Gems now i remember.
"That is correct, Doctor. For years you have tried to defeat Crash with
brute force, however have you ever tried defeating Bandicoot
psychologically?" Ripper Roo said, his once insane, maniacal voice was
now smooth, classy, and British.
Well, it's hard to tell what he sounds like because all the "talk" Roo ever said was just maniac laughter by late Dallas McKennon.
"Why yes, yes. I've got it, I'll destroy Cortex mentally to the point
he'll never recover leaving me able to enslave the Earth." Cortex
laughed evilly.
He's trying to destroy himself now? I guess Cortex has the brain of Homestar now.
WELL I AM THE EXACT SAME!
"Quite simple, we kill one thing he loves more than ever" Cortex replied. "But who will that be?" asked Uka Uka. Cortex stopped to think for a moment.
"Hmm, that is a challenge. Crunch is partly cybernetic meaning he's
practically invincible.
Pinsy is dead! Why can't you kill Tawna, she was hot!
Aku Aku is Uka Uka's twin brother so he's immortal leaving… of
course! Crash's younger sister CoCo.
You know this will turn out to be a cheap porn when certain characters name is misspelled.
By God, I'm a genius.
BAW GAWD.
Get ready
Crash Bandicoot because I will have my vengeance!" Cortex yelled before
laughing evilly.
That would make a good game name...
sadly this is not a game...
It was a normal day on Wumpa beach. Team Bandicoot were relaxing after
stopping N. Tropy from changing time to make himself ruler of the
universe.
Didn't he tried to do that like... twice?
Crash was sleeping, CoCo was inventing, and Crunch was weight
lifting.
Coco was inventing what? Also it's "lifting weight!"
Suddenly they heard something marching towards the hut. Crash,
CoCo, Crunch, and Aku Aku went to investigate. Outside were hundreds of
Cortex's lab assistant androids.
"Man, and we had to clean!" Crunch whimpered.
"Objective, destroy all Bandicoots" The androids said.
Translated to English: NYEAAAAARGH!
"Ugh, another of Cortex's army. Let's get this over with so I can get back to sleep" Crash said.
Translated to Engli... oh wait, Crash can't speak a proper language. Unless it's Pancakes.
"Crash, has your voice got deeper" CoCo asked.
STOP TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY, WRITER!
"Yeah, I think it was all that smoke I inhaled when I fought inside that volcano." Crash said.
I imagined that sentence with Troy McLure's voice.
"Crash! HELP!" It was CoCo. "Crash, CoCo's been kidnapped by Cortex's androids" Crunch informed him.
"Are you bad enough bandicoot to rescue CoCo?"
"Ugh, what the fuck?! Can't Cortex use something else as bait for once, a big, juicy Wumpa fruit pie maybe." Crash complained.
Not only that he speaks, but Crash also curses! Is this the same universe where Crash Bandicoot Retold happened???
"You go save CoCo, me and Crunch'll take care of Cortex's robots." Aku assured Crash.
Ugh, it's "i". Aaargh! Just what i needed! A Porn fanfic written by a foreigner!
After 10 minutes of running, Crash caught up to Cortex, standing atop a mountain top. "Well, if it isn't Crash Bandicoot" Cortex said, reciting his trademark catchphrase.
Ironically i never heard him say that.
"Cortex, I don't have time for this. Return CoCo, unveil your death trap, let me kick you ass and go home."
Oh, now i get it! He's just bored! Because he hasn't starred in any game since 2009!
"Sorry, Bandicoot but things are going down a little bit differently" Cortex said. "No, I'm pretty sure I'll beat you and walk out of here alive and well." Crash argued.
Oh god, if Crash is bored, Mario is dying already!
"You might, but can the same be said for your sister" Cortex retorted as
he revealed a bound and gagged CoCo. He grabbed her by her throat and
held a knife to her neck.
Knife? That's new!
Crash leaped, but two of Cortex's androids held him back. Crash was shocked that Cortex had sunk so low. "Cortex, don't, she's only 15! Please, I'll do anything!" Crash begged.
Now you even decide ages of the characters? Ugh!
Also, around the time of MOM, i can guess from her looks she was 22.
"Still a virgin, that's surprising,
Oh god! I can SOOOOO imagine Lex Lang saying that!
I thought a pretty little bandicoot such as your sister would have
plenty of partners!" exclaimed Cortex as CoCo struggled, managing to
undo her gag.
You don't know how many fan characters there exist???
Seriously, i'm a huge Crash fan but i dislike fan characters unless they're enough Bandicoot-ish. I remember i once created Fake Coco and some other stuff. You know, typical crap...
Crash gritted his teeth in rage hearing Cortex talk about his sister
like that. Then Cortex did what Crash never thought Cortex would do. He
pulled down CoCo's pants and broke CoCo's barrier, CoCo yelped in pain,
yet Cortex paid no attention.
At this point... my childhood died, again.
"Stop! Please, I beg you." Cried CoCo, in tears, she couldn't believe that this was happening. "Stop! Stop! Sto-op!" CoCo continued to cry. "You
are tight, this pleases me!" cried Cortex.
Oh god, i can imagine that in Lex Lang's voice too!
Coco suddenly went limp, she
didn't know why. She wanted to fight back with all her might, but she
could bring herself to do it. She just laid there and let Cortex take
her innocence, her pride, and her will to live. Meanwhile, Cortex
continued to insert himself, in and out of CoCo. Cortex didn't care if
CoCo didn't move. He just continued to rape CoCo
And now we have to interrupt this review for notification by independent music maker GigaSurfer, if you please.
Dear Citizens,
Rape Jokes aren't funny. AND DOWNLOAD MY SONGS DAMMIT!
And that was GigaSurfer's notification, back to the review.
Suddenly, CoCo felt Cortex climaxing inside, yet continued to just lie there. Her spirit was broken , and she no longer cared.
What a cruel way to describe the truth!
That my childhood is dead!
"Unnghn!" grunted Cortex as he finished delivering his seed into the young female bandicoot.
Not only that Cortex raped Coco, he just made himself a zoophile and a furfag. Baaad, baaad Cortex.
Crash just watched, tears streaming down his face. Finally, using all
his strength he broke the robots' grip and destroyed them using his spin
attack. As he ran towards the cliff Cortex stabbed CoCo and threw her
off the side of the cliff. Crash ran and dove, managing to catch her
just in time. The knife was still in her chest. She was coughing up blood and in critical condition. "C-Crash" Coco said, slowing dying. "CoCo, it's all gonna be okay" Crash said as he carefully as he scooped CoCo in his arms and ran as fast as he could. The young female bandicoot closed her eyes as she breathed her last breath and died.
That... was... depressing...
Oh my god... why did i do this? My childhood wasn't raped by porn, it was raped by... rape
This, is worse than Crash Bandicoot Retold! Whoever wrote this is mentally crazy! I just...AAAGH!
Why didn't i stayed in My Immortal? This fanfic is officially worse than My Immortal in my opinion! Coco lost the meaning of life... when she was raped by one of my favourite villains. AAAAGH! There's also six other chapters. But i'm too horrified to read 'em.
